I ran out of toilet paper...

I got out of bed..."Why did I get out of bed today???" 

I have wondered that question ALL day long.  Ever have "one of those days?"  

and then you hear the saying..."things change in a second."  They really can.

I ran out of toilet paper today.
 This may not be a big deal to some people.

It is to me.  Today.

It says to me that I have lost all control.

I asked my daughters today,
 "Can you tell me the last time you can remember us ever running out of toilet paper?"
They could not remember a time that we have ever ran out of toilet paper.  

Still you may be asking yourself, "Why is this a big deal?"

Because I don't ever...E...V...E...R... let that happen.

So how did this happen?  

How did I loose control? 

I am sitting here now trying to decide how to explain.  

My mother is in the hospital (see yesterdays post) and her surgery was postponed again.  

Now the doctors are saying that it will hopefully be Thursday.    

I had a tough day with my mother and trying to take care of things with her today.  

And then...

My daughter, who is 25, came to me Friday and said she had a "knot" on her hip.  

There was no bruise, no redness, no anything.  Just that the area had started swelling and hurt.  

She could not get a doctor's appointment with her regular doctor.  She has tried for the past two days.  No appointment till Friday so I suggested she go ahead and go to Urgent Care and see what they think.  

The doctor did x-rays.

The doctor found something.  

A fairly big dark spot in her hip bone.   

We should know something by tomorrow evening. 

He said it could nothing.  Maybe just the way the bone is growing.  

It is in the shape of the sun.  A circle in the middle with the rays coming out from it.

He is an older man who was a doctor in the military.  He said he had never seen anything like it.

I can't stop thinking about it.

Did I mention my mother has cancer?

Did I mention I had a niece die of cancer at the age of 21?

Did I mention that my grandfather and 2 of my uncles died of cancer?

It may be nothing. 

I am terrified.

On top of all of this..I ran out of toilet paper today. 

Surgery and Snow

For those of you who don't know from reading my blog,  my mother, who is 76 and weighs 93 pounds,  has rectal cancer.  She was scheduled for surgery last Monday and when we received 6 inches or so of snow, her surgery was cancelled.  We took my Mom to the hospital today for her surgery to have her tumor removed.  Well, as they were prepping her for surgery her heart rate was extremely high.  She was in "a fib"  and her kidneys were not functioning properly.  So no surgery today.  Her doctor admitted her to the hospital to see if they can get her doing well enough to have surgery.  Right now they are saying she should be able to have surgery Wednesday.   

I have been against the surgery since the Dr. told us about it and all the risks involved but it is her decision and I would never tell her that.  I will always support her decisions and take care of her.  I have been through lots of serious situations with my Mom but I have never had the feeling about anything like I have about this surgery.  I find it odd that she has been scheduled twice and both times she has been rescheduled.  Maybe it is not meant for her to have it.  We will take it a day at a time like we have since she was diagnosed with cancer.  

My Little Mommy

On another, lighter and whiter note...we are getting more snow again and the weather channel is calling for another big one coming this Friday too.    I love the snow.  

I know this is a random post but I am a little tired and stressed from being at the hospital all day.  

By the way..Cancer sucks.

Furniture Shopping

Mr. Fix-It and I had a wonderful day Saturday shopping and just being together.  He was coming off of a 7 day, 12 hours a night, work week.  I feel like I don't get to see him at all during weeks like that.

We headed to Blowing Rock and started looking at furniture.  I am happy that usually when we are shopping for something for the house we tend to like the same things.  All of these pictures were taken by my cell phone so they are not the best quality.

I found this love seat that we both liked.  It is covered in a taupe duck cloth.  Very durable.

We want two recliners and I was so mad at myself when I got home and I realized that I did not take a picture of the recliner.  I do have a picture of the fabric that I want on the recliners.   

Sample of Fabric

It has grays and blacks and browns in the wording.  It is all about planing and gardening and I love it.

This was a pillow from a chaise lounge that was covered in the fabric.

The only sample they had that was similar to the  fabric I want had French words on it.  The colors were the same as the gardening fabric,  It looks so good with the color of the sofa.

This is the Lamp that I fell in love with.  He is so cute and since we call our place "The Rabbit Hole" I thought it would go well in our house.

I have been looking for a wine rack and I think this one would look great.  But Mr. Fix-It said I couldn't buy it.  Instead he said he would build me one.  This one has a hammered copper top.  So pretty.

We left Boone and rode on the parkway for a while.  I have some pictures of deer I will have to share.  Then we left Boone and headed to Hickory for the evening.  I bought a few things for the house there that I will share over the next few days if all go well.

My mother is having her major surgery tomorrow and I am scared to death.  I am so worried that she will not make it through.  I will post again soon I hope.  

Lines...Color...Repetition...Form...Textures...Pattern...
Where to start?
I am having such difficulties with my living room.  I know the look I want to achieve but for some reason just can not get it going.  We have moved into several houses over the past 26 years but decorating this one is giving me a tougher time than any of them.   I have new flooring, new curtains, new lamps.  I know I need new furniture.  I have my eye and heart set on this sofa with an extra cover in white for the summer.  

Ektorp Sofa -Ikea

But after sitting in this loveseat from Pier 1 last week I really like the way it sat and high back.  Mr Fix-It and I both did.  

Paisley Loveseat from Pier 1

I am afraid it would be too style specific but it would look great in my living room with some of the antique furniture I have.

I also have to choose a wall color.  I am thinking something in a warmer gray color.  Light gray but warm.  Do I want to have an accent wall?  Do I want to paint it all one color?  I really like the color of this room.  Maybe a shade or two lighter that this.

Image from Decor Pad

Benjamin Moore has a color on their website shown under Our 5 Favorite Grays.  It is called Revere Pewter.    A nice gray with warm yellow undertones.  I think that would look good with my flooring. 

Revere Pewter from Benjamin Moore

I can't decide if I want to do a wall of pictures in my living room.  I like looking at them in other people's houses.  I know I need to unify them with the same color of frames and mats.
I am afraid it might make things look too cluttered  because I know me...it will be hard for me to edit them down to just a few.  

Pottery Barn

I feel like I am headed in the right direction.  Actually taking the time to write this blog today has helped me see where I want to go with the look of the room.   Thanks for helping me think things through.  

I need to get myself in gear and get it done.  We have been out of school, where I work, due to another snow that we received over the past two days.  I think I can get out tomorrow...maybe I should go get some paint.  That is an idea. 

Getting Ready.

I haven't been able to post anything this week.  I have worked late (730-8:30 pm) every night this week. I have been trying to get ready for being out of work to spend time with my Mom when she has surgery.  It is scheduled for tomorrow (Monday, Jan 10) at 9:00 am.  The doctor's are going to try and remove her tumor.  It is supposed to be a long surgery.  HOWEVER, the weatherman is now calling for close to a foot of snow for our area tomorrow so Mom is talking about postponing.  

I am looking forward to this coming weekend. Me, Mr. Fix-It, Lynnette who is my best friend since high school and her husband are all taking off on an impromptu weekend getaway.  We are going to visit Louisville, Kentucky.  I am so excited.

  

Talk to you all soon!

My New Old Cabinet

I have a makeover to share. 

Long in the making and not exactly completely finished.  

But close enough that I thought I could share.

A can of paint and a paintbrush can do wonders.

If you visit my blog you may have seen these before.  

I bought them for $6.50 for the pair at a visit to the flea market.

This is a cabinet that my husband built for me several years ago.  

I have mentioned that the house we just sold was decorated in primitive country.

I didn't want to part with this and we have no room for it in storage.

It did not go with the look I am looking for in the new place.

I really wanted to make it into a statement piece.  

So I chose a WOW color...It is called Weathered Glass.  

It looks like the color of the antique blue glass canning jars.

So here is my new cabinet!

Yes it is still missing hardware and I am thinking about distressing it some.  

I have been looking for knobs for about 2 months now and can not find the ones that just "speak" to me.

We used it through the holidays as the drink station.

Top Shelf.

Middle Shelf.  The jars are not monogrammed.  

Those are my initial  plates leaned up behind the jars.

Bottom shelf.  Leftovers of the holiday drink station.

My new shelf...very different for me and a new direction.

Thanks for visiting and checking out my cabinet makeover.  Let me know what you think!

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January-Projects in Process

I think I am making January the "finish my projects in progress" month.  

No I am not talking about the remodeling projects we have.

I have a feeling those will be going on ALL year.  We still have so much to do and work on.

So a few projects I need to fish up...

I started this one back in the summer.  It was for the log house we were (and now eventually are) going to build.  I had/have all sorts of ideas for it.  When we moved to the place we live now, I knew I would have plenty of time to finish it up.  

I hand carved the background and the letters.  I am wood burning all of the letters, the pine cones and branches.  

I am working on the border.

And I still have a lot left to do.  I just have to find my wood burning kit.
I have seen my kit somewhere since we moved.  I think.

My next project to finish is some knitting.
I am ashamed to say that I started it almost 2 and a half years ago.

I am working on this throw.  

I have two more skeins of yarn to go.

I think I will take this with me next week when my mother has her surgery. 

 I can work on it while I sit in the hospital with her.  

It is my goal to finish up my projects that I have close to being finished before I let myself start any more.

So my first little goal of 2011 is to finish up those unfinished projects.